Oct 4, 2009

hello people

I think i've lost the blogging mood, it might be awhile before i might blog daily again. Holidays are ending soon, i don't want it to end, although there's like tons of heartbreaks this holiday. Haven't been eating well recently, it's either one meal per day or none at all. But as usual, cigarettes still. Gastric has been the ultimate bitch recently, i absofuckinglutely hate the feeling/taste after puking. It's a pain in the ass.

4bia2 with the usual gang yesterday. 4bia2 was rather lame, it's the fucking sound effects that makes me cover my face and close my ears. And the last scene was damn hilarious. And then off to the pub again. Major gastric pain. The fucking smart me drank on an empty stomach, didn't eat for the whole day. So the wise me was puking and puking and still puking my guts out. Seriously, at fucking 5am i'm still puking. The gastric juices etc, it was seriously damn pain. Can feel my stomach clenching up and stuff. No more again...till the next time. Haha.

I haven't been going home on a regular basis lately, it's either i reach home in the wee hours, or i don't go home at all. And haven't been sleeping well too. It's like, i just can't be bothered with anything already. Life's been pretty mundane lately.

Been closing up with several people, and then going mia on them. I don't know why, guess i'm just afraid now. Have been given closure on several important matters, made some difficult decisions. It's gonna be a pretty bad time for me, for the next 5 months, at least. But no choice, who asked me to be so gullible and trust people easily? But still, fuck them upside down, seriously.

What would you do if i say i miss you when i don't get to see you?
What would you think if i say i'm afraid i like you?
Cause i really don't know the answer myself.

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